Tuesday 30 August 2011

One change: Some loss, Some gain...

In India, marriage is a very weird but a very common and must thing. We don’t leave our homes when we grow off age; we stay with our parents, our families. When we get married we have so many new relations, new surroundings to cope up with. Everything changes for both the girl and the guy. Most often there are arranged marriages here, but as time keeps changing so does the way of choosing a partner.

The girl is bestowed with so many new things that she has to carry with her utmost ability. She is now someone’s daughter in law, someone’s grand- daughter in law, an aunt, a sister is law, and most important someone’s wife. Well, the ‘Wife’ part comes a little late here. The reason is, when a guy chooses a girl, he sees that she should be well accepted by all of his family members. More than his wife, she is a daughter in law or a grand-daughter in law. So the major part is being accepted by his parents and grand-parents. She is the one who is supposed to take care of the whole family from now on. The same is with the girl. She chooses a guy whom all her family members accept and would love to see her with. Who they think would be able to take care of their girl and keep her happy all her life.
The guy’s life changes too. Though very little. He has never had much of responsibilities. Till now he just had to earn for his parents and live for himself. But now, he has a family, a family of his own. So now comes a time when his responsibilities increase. His way of living changes also changes. He has to adjust according to the new person in his life and home. The things which his mother used to do are now in his wife’s to-do list. He has a new face and environment to face when he gets back home from work. He has a new responsibility, his wife. He needs to keep her happy, support her and understand her. While doing this, he must also see that he isn’t hurting his parents and any of his own family people.
The girl has to undergo different way of living. Firstly, she has to live with an altogether different family, with their different way of living. She cannot live or be the way when in her parent’s home. She has to take care of many things. She has to be more composed responsible and understanding.
Things for a guy change less as compared to a girl because he doesn’t have to live with a different family nor does he have to leave his own. But in all this, this feeling of change is bliss. You start with difficulties but end up having a good future. If the girl’s in-laws are equally good they provide the girl a good support.

Everyone here goes through this marriage business. They love it, enjoy it, fear it, but have to go through it. This is not only about the marrying couple, but also about the people related to them. The mother has a weird understanding that her son or daughter has grown so much that he/she is supposed to get married. The others have the same feeling. The sister has played with her sister or brother in her childhood, has experienced so many changes together for all these years. But now the things will change. They are all happy with the new change. But there is also a loss of all those old days.

Things do change, you lose a bit, but still, you gain a lot more. There are many things to look forward to. Though looking back give u tears of happiness, you need to keep just one thing in mind. Cherish the old memories, and make way for the new ones coming your way.

Cheers to you, cheers to lyf…

1 comment:

  1. a clear narration of conventional Indian system!
    i could go thru the writer's mind...gud one...

    ReplyDelete